Come to me, all you that are weary and are carrying heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11: 28-30)
work·a·hol·ism
noun
INFORMAL
- a compulsionto work excessively hard and long hours. (Oxford Languages Dictionary)
This week at Chat n Chew, some one commented to me that they weren’t sure what days each week I had ‘off’ because I work on Sundays. They had sent me a fairly urgent email the day before (Monday) and were surprised that I had responded right away. Just for the record, I typically do work on Mondays. It’s the day that I finish up the bulletin so that I can get it out to the other worship leaders and to Linda in a timely way. Mostly because then everyone else can catch my mistakes! (Thank you, Linda). I also start the research for my sermon, and do the little bits of admin stuff that comes up every week. Just so you know, from start to finish; worship takes about half of my work week up.
Anyway, long way around saying that I usually DO work on Mondays. But this prompted a whole lot of good natured ribbing from the rest of the Chat n Chew crew at how bad I am at taking time off.
And they’re right. I am really bad at taking time off. I have a brutal case of FOMO (Fear of Missing Out), and have a whole lot of problem not sticking my nose into everything that’s going on at Bethel. I also really appreciate that I have a whole lot of control over how I use my time, and so I may overwork, but I can easily take off to an appointment mid-day or work from my home out on the deck when the weather is nice. I also know that the idea of rest has been something I’ve written about before. I’m guessing that this is because I’m still not getting my own teaching lol, so all of you are inflicted with MY life lessons.
The unfortunate reality of my life is that I only feel like I’m “doing a good job” if I’m overworking. It isn’t just a ministry thing. I worked like this when I was working other jobs too. And it’s insidious, because well – ‘work-aholism’ is the only socially sanctioned addiction around. People, especially bosses, like employees who overwork; who habitually stay late to get things done “for the team;” who ‘go the extra mile’ to meet unreasonable deadlines, and untenable demands. I also work a job that has non-traditional hours; , for most of you this is your worshiping community, not your place of employment; so many things happen in the evening or on the days that are considered my days off.
I began working too much simply because, earlier in my adult life, it was seen as the only way that you could distinguish yourself as an employee. Now, my life is set up in such a way that putting in extra time into my work life is simply the way I do things; and I have very few hobbies and recreational activities to take up the rest of my head space. And I know that I’m not alone in this. Because many of you had your lives set up so that the bulk of your time and energy went to working, and interests and activities that didn’t bring money into the home were not considered as important or as ‘valid’ as jobs.
(I mean, really, why do things like vacations actually exist? Aren’t they just living?)
I’m also more than aware that its at about this point that my supportive M & P committee would step in and remind me that I’m setting myself up for burn out, and that I really need to take some time away from the church. In fact, I had a conversation with Kathleen just last week about this whole issue!
So this week when I picked up our scriptures for Sunday, I was really struck by the phrase “Take MY yoke upon you and LEARN from me”. (Caps are mine, of course).
You see, I think that we are all carrying the yoke of social expectations. The yoke that tells us that overworking is virtuous and that burn out is martyrdom. This same yoke tells us that our responsibility is to disregard or own needs for rest and relaxation, for comfort and ease, in pursuit of material comfort for ourselves and for our families; and that the only way to do this is to work and work more than we relax and rest. And that this is the yoke that we need to put down, and instead, look at what Jesus is saying that we need to learn from. Because, it’s a hugely different lesson than the one all of us have internalized overtime.
God’s teaching tells us that we are worthy simply because we are. Not because of what we do.
God’s teaching tells us that life comes through God, not through us working and making money.
God’s teaching that tells us that there not only is a place of working, but a place of rest. And that having a ‘heavy burdens’ does not make us better people. In fact, those heavy burdens of overwork and FOMO, and even of seeking validity through what we ‘do’ rather than who we are, is the yoke that we need to lay down; and the ‘light’ burden of God’s teaching and direction is what we need to take up.
So, my friends, now that this blog is posted, and knowing that although I’m done this piece of ‘work,’ ministry is never really done, I’m going to lay down this burden and take some time in rest. I hope all of you will join me.
Blessings today and remember you are Loved,
~Rev. Lynne