11 I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. 12 I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. 13 I can do all this through him who gives me strength. ( Philippians 4: 11-13)
6 But godliness with contentment is great gain. 7 For we brought nothing into the world, and we can take nothing out of it. 8 But if we have food and clothing, we will be content with that. 9 Those who want to get rich fall into temptation and a trap and into many foolish and harmful desires that plunge people into ruin and destruction. 10 For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs. (1 Timothy 6: 6-10)
You can’t always get what you want
But if you try sometime you’ll find
You get what you need (The Rolling Stones)
The other day I broke out my upholstery cleaner and cleaned the couch in my living room. I know – not a big deal to most of you; but Hugh and I, and the dog pretty much live on the couch. We eat many meals there. Having your feet up on the couch is normalized in this household. In fact, I’m sitting on the couch right now using a tv table as my desk, with the dog curled up next to me. I have a cup of coffee beside me and I just finished my breakfast bagel with cream cheese and I inadvertently wiped my greasy cheesy fingers on the arm of the couch so that I could type on my computer.
The couch gets dirty pretty quickly in my house. The couch is also pretty old. We got it second hand from Habitat for Humanity when the previous couch we had bit the dust. We just had to replace the foam in the cushions because the original foam had flattened out so much that my hips would get sore sitting on them.
So, I steamed the couch out, and as I was doing so I realized that the carpet (also second hand) needed a really good steaming. So did the arm chair that was my grandparents. The other arm chair that I got from my grandparents has a quilt (Made by Bonnie Leclair!) strategically covering the holes and the stains. I think that the dirt holds that chair together so I’m not even going to try and clean it.
I got the upholstery and the carpet cleaned as much as I could, and I looked up at the window sheers and pondered putting them in the wash, but realized pretty quickly that no amount of washing would help them. Hmmmm……maybe they need to be replaced? But if I’m going to replace the sheers shouldn’t I replace that one bedraggled air chair? And really, maybe I should go for a new trendy sectional couch in a tone of grey that seems like everyone has these days?
The more I cleaned, the more I had this growing sense of discontent. The more the discontent, the more I plotted house renovations and new furniture. And then, there was this nagging sense of inadequacy. My house – with the couch that has propped up my family for a long time, and likely propped up another family before us – all of a sudden became an embarrassment. Then all of my furniture became an embarrassment. Then my whole house became an embarrassment.
Then I became and embarrassment.
The simple act of cleaning my couch turned in a ‘black hole’ of discontent and embarrassment. And the sense that somehow this couch represented that I didn’t ‘measure up’ to some type of mythical standard of ‘goodness’ or ‘adequacy’.
And see, here’s the thing my dear Bethel friends, – somehow we have turned the acquisition of certain types of materialism into a judgement of character. We have made ‘stuff’ into something that makes us ‘good’; and the ‘stuff’ also needs to look a certain way, to be of a certain era to be of value and even have to be a certain colour. Then – as soon as we have the right ‘stuff’ then somehow we are valid as people.
And the stuff becomes who we are.
And so the lack of the ‘right’ stuff also becomes who we are.
Now, I will be the first to tell you that I ‘get’ that all of this is in degrees and that not all of us operate with the materialism=validity equation. To be sure, despite this whole example, I don’t even have that clear an equation in my head. But materialism looms large in our world, eh. And unfortunately advertising only exists because materialism looms large, and because it fosters discontentment and a sense of inadequacy.
The easy solution to all of this is contentment. But, contentment can only be birthed out of gratitude. And the gratitude can only come if we shift our thoughts away from whether or not we have the right things or have embraced the right trends, to God.
We have to shift our thoughts away from our stuff. Or the stuff we think makes us valid. And to a whole new set of values that embrace the gifts that God has given us over the things that we have acquired.
But, unfortunately, God doesn’t have a good marketing manager and so God is not projected to us in the same way that ads for new furniture is. So, we have to do the work. We have to make the conscious shift away from the ‘stuff’ of our lives to God.
So, my dear Bethel friends, this week as you fuss at your living room or your clothes or even your hair, I hope you will join me in just breathing through it all – and remembering who you really are in God’s eyes.
Because, while you’ve been pursuing a certain look; God has made you in God’s image. And THAT is who we are.
Blessings today and remember you are Loved.
~Rev. Lynne
Oh boy,does that sound familiar. 🙄 The insidious brainwashing of advertising & our own self defeating thoughts !!
I feel a tug of war inside between gratitude for all that I have & the persistent feeling that it’s not enough. Most days gratitude wins!